There are two functions of behaviour; to attain the desirable or to escape.

Well im a bit upset, ive been looking on the internet now for an hour and still have not found a photo i really like. Ugh. Went to the roxy last Thursday with mel and shay. We went to go see Andrews band lim vociferous (sp?) They played some pretty sick metal music, not really my favourite genre though. I literally couldn’t hear myself think (aw jeeze. I sound like an old person). It was a lot of fun though. We pre drank, as to save ourselves some money, but you know me.. always have to have a drink in my hand. I actually managed to convince this one guy to buy me two vodka redbull shots and a double long island iced tea. So by the end of the night, i was trashed. It was fun. I missed dancing.. It was so much fun being out with the girls, but as usual Jeff ends up picking us up. I don’t mean to act ungrateful, but at the same time.. is it really a girls night if Jeff always shows up at the end? I’d just like to have one night out, where we just have to figure our shit out.. and it will likely be hilarious. My weekend was pretty feeble. Friday was a right off.. Ashlynn and Colton drama took the night by its balls. I’ve informed her of this site so hopefully she starts her own. It’s a good way to vent and work out your problems. Saturday was a lazy day that ended up with Chris showing up at my house unexpectedly. It was a nice surprise, and a fantastic night. We hung out at my place until my parents got home and then went over to his to smoke and watch a movie with Blaire and Wes, Super High Me. And then ended up back in my bed to munch out and sleep. It’s funny, since we’ve broken up I’ve been having more fun with him then I ever did when we were dating. It seems like friends is definitely the better idea. And he even slept over.. that was the unbelievable part. I ran into Mitch the other day at the pool, on his way to the gym of course. I hope to hang out again soon with him and james. The last time was a really great night. And then there was last night. Chris and I went to the Christmas train. I am usually not a very big Christmas fan, but the lights were fantastic. And everything was perfect. That’s really all I can say. It was a night of surprises. Anyways, I should probably be getting to bed

questioning,

AH JUST FUCKING POSTED A WHOLE BUNCH OF SHIT AND IT DIDN'T WORK. KILL ME.
Alright so today is not going so well. Well it's been good and bad, just like my mood every couple of seconds. Had a beer with justin and immy tonight.. baked cookies with shay and ashlynn. I just don't feel right on the inside.. like i go from super happy to shaking in fear. I don't trust anyone, and I just seriously need a constant in my life. Currently I'm just trying to become friends with Chris again. I'm just so freaked he's going to think I want to get back together with him.. I just want to be friends!!!! I've lost so many people in the last few months.. the thought of loosing one more, especially the one person who I truley trusted for the last two years of my life.. it just gives me this sinking feeling in my stomach. Anyways, life I guess goes on.